Cat Poem

I wrote this for my Dad's birthday in April. He likes cats.

Taking a stroll in the Mediterranean moonlight

In an alley bathed in that glorious white

I encountered a cat as black as the sky

And an emerald sparkling in each round, frightened eye

I knelt down to stroke its small head

But it mewed in surprise and across the street fled

Before it turned back to me and said in a voice full of grace

That this cat had come from Outer Space

It had not opened its mouth nor made a sound

Simply sat there with olive eyes so bright and profound

It talked to me in my brain, using feline telepathy

This remarkable cat had ESP!

Naturally I took it home and ran scientific tests

Performed various experiments despite its mewling protests

And whenever my sweet wife knocked at the door

I’d turn off the lights and pretend to snore

No one could ruin my chances of fame!

Of taking this space cat and making it tame

Using it to rule the world, well, somehow

With its wise little whiskers and omnipotent meow

But one night my wife found me probing the cat

I was taking X-rays and wearing my tinfoil hat

She screamed, locked me in, and phoned the police

That’s when my work, well, it had to cease

Of course they promptly had me committed

The nature of my research, I openly admitted

No one would believe it had come from space!

That this kitten belonged to an alien race

Before I could stop them they whisked it away

Doubtless, they relinquished it to the CIA

I had no chance to say farewell to the miraculous thing

For they gave me a shot, and boy did it sting!

I tell you my story in the hope you’ll believe

Of the miracles I swear that I have perceived

The extraterrestrial feline I myself have looked at

The marvelous, the spectacular—the psychic space cat!