The Best Fucking Carbon Neutral Post in the Fucking Blogosphere

We live in a society and--increasingly so--a world that worships the material object. We live in a nation with a Supersize-Me philosophy that revels in a culture sick with rampant capitalism. Superstores are colonizing the face of the continent like a bacteria, those air-conditioned palaces with endless oceans of cheap trinkets and snack foods and clothes and accessories and video games and smart phones and a seemingly never-ending supply of anything you could ever need or want. We are all disciples of a religion that worships gods of wealth, a religion that preaches the importance of having and possesses the mutual goal of having everything.

Even if we lived on a planet with free refills, natural resources that reappeared after you exhausted them like Strega Nona's magic pasta pot, I would still believe that our society's materialistic value system is deeply flawed. But we don't. The reality is that, even putting moral codes aside, we live on a planet with limited resources, and the human population has exceeded seven billion. Furthermore, it's increasing astronomically every year. According to the United Nations' World Population Prospects report, the world population is expected to reach nine billion by 2050, and that's assuming that there will be a decrease in the average fertility rate from 2.5 to 2.0%. At this rate, we're going to spill over the sides of the earth--and even if we don't, there is no possible way the earth's resources can sustain us, especially if the entirety of that nine billion adopts America's Super-sized lifestyle attitude.

There is no denying that human pollution is both a reality and an issue, but the next question most people would ask, of course, is whether or not Climate Change/Global Warming is an actual phenomenon, whether or not humans are behind it, and whether or not it poses a threat.

In all honesty, I am not a chemist. I am not a scientist. I'm a high school student who got a C+ on his last science test. What do I know about the effect of increased carbon emissions on the global temperature? What do I know about atmospheric gases or temperature and weather cycles or anything even vaguely scientific? VERY LITTLE!

Like everyone else in the world, much of what I believe is founded upon what others have told me. Sure, the sky is blue because I can see it, and I know water is wet because I just spilled some down my shirt. But how does a person like me know that those little twinkling spots in the night sky are in fact humongous balls of gas and fire? How does someone like me know that atoms exist, or that the Big Bang occurred? How do we know there's a God? How do we know there's not? How do we know that North Dakota is actually a place? (That's right! Have YOU ever been there? I didn't think so.)

The obvious reply might be that the reason we believe in those things is because the rational-thinking people and the scientific communities of the world have reached a consensus that the above-mentioned scientific ideas are valid, but weren't they all at one time considered heretical to someone or another? How do we know anything is real, except based upon what other people tell us?

Okay, maybe I'm straying from the issue here, but the point I'm trying to make is that I still believe that Climate Change is a reality and I still believe that it is a threat even though I have not performed any scientific experiments or done an in-depth investigation of the issue. All I have to go on is what people tell me--what arguments sound most convincing and whether or not the author behind the article or the speaker at the presentation is a credible source. On the other hand, how are the voices speaking out against Global Warming anymore valid than those in support of it? People say it's a big hoax, but then again, some people said the Holocaust was a hoax. Bang. Now it's out there. And I'm not comparing those who speak out against the theory of Climate Change to neo-Nazis; I'm only making the point that there are a lot of very strong-willed opinions out there and a lot of convincing arguments and a lot of people absolutely certain that they are right. How do I know who to believe?

BUT HERE'S THE THING. I am willing to compromise with people who do not see Climate Change as a) an actual phenomenon or b) a threat to humans or the planet. Because I have not executed any thorough research on the issue, I decidedly do not judge those who do not view Climate Change as a reality, but to those who scoff at it and call it a hoax, I have something to say.

I ask you to consider the absurd amounts of pollution we pump into the sky, black billowing smoke erupting from the exhaust pipes of millions of SUV's and eighteen wheelers--and the humongous clouds of brown smoke that constantly flow from factories and chemical plants all over the world. I ask you to think about the hundreds of various manufactured items around your house, and where they might have come from, what had to be destroyed for them to be created, the carbon emissions required to transport them to you, etc. Think about all of those things collectively in your own home, and then think about those things in hundreds of millions of homes all over the world.

Consider the impossible amounts of garbage clogging enormous landfills, the preposterous quantities of waste and sewage deposited in oceans and rivers all over the world, and the outrageous amount of deforestation, mining, and oil drilling that takes place daily on this planet. Think about all of the SHIT we've been putting our planet through everyday, just by consuming. Just by living this lifestyle, which seems so reasonable to us.

And you have to think, even putting the idea of Climate Change aside, how could this NOT be bad for the planet? How can people pretend as though there's nothing wrong? How could you possibly make the case that pollution is not an issue and that preservation and protection of the Environment is not a priority? How?

Fate or chance or God or gods or whatever...have gifted us with this fantastic planet, this "pale blue dot," the only place currently known in the Universe to support life. Yet we're destroying it--decimating animal populations, cutting down rainforests, damming rivers, drilling into the ground, littering, hoarding. If we fuck it up on this planet, what else is left?

Who's at fault for this? Are we evil for what we're doing to the Earth? Well, we are at fault, but we aren't evil for what we're doing. We're just scared. We're scared of death, scared of hunger, scared of disease, scared of darkness. And the best way we can think of to cope with this is building up walls against these things--and making ourselves feel invincible. Immortal. We are human beings. We're above death--above nature. How can something silly like Global Warming affect us? How could the Earth possibly fail to support us?

But we are mortal. We are human, but we are only human. We can't protect ourselves against death or hunger or disease or darkness, and we can't allow ourselves to ignore the fact that we have to change our ways. We have to change our lifestyles and our philosophies and we have to start being creative in thinking about how we can change things before it's too late.

Change isn't going to come by itself. We have to be the ones to enact it. That includes me. And that includes you.

You begin by doing the simple things. Reduce, Reuse, and Recycle, remembering that those come in order of importance. First, reduce the quantities you use of things, especially disposable objects like plastic or paper. Second, reuse those things you do use--such as using cloth bags or giving away old clothes or possessions. Finally, when you feel you have done your best effort to Reduce and Reuse, you can Recycle. Paper, glass, batteries, and some plastics.

You can carpool. Or ride your bike if you're not that far away. Start a compost pile in your backyard, and buy a book to figure out how to use it. Then build a vegetable garden so you can use the soil from the compost pile.

Turn off the lights when you leave the room. Buy reusable water bottles instead of purchasing plastic ones. Take showers instead of baths, and making sure they're under five minutes. Time yourself and record the times to wean yourself off long showers. If you're in a drought, you can put a bucket under the water and reuse the water from showers or washing dishes to water the planets in your yard.

Get a rain barrel to connect a hose to. Start buying earth-friendly products, such as laundry detergents. Buy journals and notebooks with recycled paper. Turn the thermostat slightly down in the winter and slightly up in the summer. Unplug your electronic devices when you're not using them!!!

Make your blog Carbon Neutral.



We start with the little things. And once we've done that, we can move on to bigger things.

You can't let yourself be overcome with apathy. It's so easy--just take the initiative to do SOMETHING. To do ANYTHING. The earth isn't going to fix itself for us. We need to wake up and make a change or else...

Well, or else we're fucked.

-Christopher